{"id":2292,"date":"2015-06-18T20:28:08","date_gmt":"2015-06-18T10:28:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/eisabainyo.net\/weblog\/?p=2292"},"modified":"2020-11-09T11:48:59","modified_gmt":"2020-11-09T01:48:59","slug":"the-art-of-saying-no-at-workplace","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/eisabainyo.net\/weblog\/2015\/06\/18\/the-art-of-saying-no-at-workplace\/","title":{"rendered":"The Art Of Saying No At Workplace"},"content":{"rendered":"

In the best selling book Lean In<\/strong> by Sheryl Sandberg<\/strong>, the Chief Operating Officer of Facebook encouraged women to step up, stand on their ground and have the courage to push back when it is necessary. I can understand why she said that because it is not uncommon to read about women always being too willing to say yes. Would you like to organise catering for the meeting? Yes, sure! Could you please compile an xx report and send it to me? Certainly. Do you want to be involved in the discussion about xx? I\u2019d love to! While the main audience of Lean In is working women, I believe there are also men who struggle to say no and Sheryl Sandberg\u2019s advice applies to them too.<\/p>\n

So the question is how do we say no, how do we decline nicely as to not burn bridges. While I am no expert, I\u2019ve learned a lot in my career to be more confident and to have the courage to say no and I\u2019d like to share with you some tips.<\/p>\n

Understand why you don\u2019t like saying no<\/strong>
\nEveryone is different and we have different reasons for not wanting to say no. Some of the common reasons are:
\n\u2013 Not wanting to appear negative
\n\u2013 Not wanting to upset or offend the other person
\n\u2013 Worry about possible consequences, eg: missed opportunities
\n\u2013 Desire to please everyone<\/p>\n

Once we understand our own reasons behind not wanting to say no, we can make a rational decision. For example, if it was because of our inner desire to please everyone and keep everyone in harmony, we need to think about ourselves first and whether we really want to say yes or we are just saying yes without thinking. Besides, we can\u2019t always please everyone, it is simply impossible. However, we can always do the right thing and sometimes the right thing to do is to say no.<\/p>\n

How to say no positively
\n<\/strong>Saying no doesn\u2019t have to be negative and the trick is how the message is being delivered. Here are some of the most effective ways to say no positively, based on my experience.<\/p>\n

1. Give a reason
\n<\/strong>Sometimes, you can\u2019t possibly say yes even though you wish you could due to circumstances such as prior engagements, current commitments and so on. In these cases, give a reason and you may not even need to use the word no. For example: I\u2019d like to come to the meeting but I\u2019ve got an important report to finish by tomorrow.<\/p>\n

2. Decline respectfully and don\u2019t make it personal
\n<\/strong>If you are saying no to an offer because you don\u2019t like it, be frank and don\u2019t try to sugar-coat it. I say this because sometimes, people try to give a half-hearted compliment before saying no. But the problem with this approach is that insincerity shines through. It\u2019s better to be honest and respectful and the other party will appreciate it. In these situations, a simple no thanks will do.<\/p>\n